Tuesday, February 2, 2010

Chivalry is dead? Not quite, but who's to blame for a dying breed...

Women. Yep, I said it.

Last night while watching The Quiet Man, one of my favorite John Wayne movies of all time, I found myself wishing that we lived in a time where men still behaved like men and had the utmost respect for women...and pursued them with passion and determination.

I know very very very few women that wouldn't absolutely love a John Wayne of their own...a man of few words that means what he says when he does speak; tall, dark and handsome; not afraid to fight for what he believes in; loves and respects his Maker; would die for what he loves; tender and tough all at the same time; wears a good pair of cowboy boots; treats his woman with the respect she deserves; knows how to keep her in line just by being the man that he is...

So what happened to these men we are so "desperately" searching for??? The key word is desperate. Somewhere along the way, women have completely lost their self-confidence and independence. I'm not a women's right activist or anything by any means - that's not where I'm going with this. Women are relational to the core, so we all desire to have someone to care for and share life with...but at some point we decided to settle for anything. When you start lowering your standards, guys obviously don't have to work so hard. I had a guy say to me word for word, "Why would a guy go for a girl he has to work for? There's like 10 easy ones for every one of those..." What a terrible truth. Women have lost respect for themselves, so men have as well. So please save your breath and don't complain about chivalry being dead when women don't even demand it anymore. I'm not saying that men shouldn't share any of the blame either...but it's human nature to be lazy, so why work for something if you don't have to?

So ladies, find your confidence in the One who is "enthralled by your beauty." Respect the heart, body, and mind you were blessed with enough to wait for only the best. Your Maker created you and knows you heart and desires better than you do. Trust Him to meet your needs. And step it up. Have high expectation for the men that you date--expect to be taken on real dates, expect to have the door held open for you, expect to be spoken to respectfully, and expect to be pursued.

And guys, step up to the plate. Be the man that real women need and deserve. We need guys that know how to have fun without playing games with our hearts. And keep in mind the women you have to work for are the ones who are more than worth it...I'll guarantee it :)

"If I marry: He must be so tall that when he is on his knees, as one has said, he reaches all the way to Heaven. His shoulders must be broad enough to bear the burden of a family. His lips must be strong enough to smile, firm enough to say no, and tender enough to kiss. Love must be so deep that it takes its stand in Christ and so wide that it takes the whole lost world in. He must be active enough to save souls. He must be big enough to be gentle and great enough to be thoughtful. His arms must be strong enough to carry a little child." -Ruth Bell Graham